corporal experimentation
We are keeping Caroline under observation. Upon meeting her we discovered that she is so awesome she must be, on some level, fictional. We are detaining her in my flat until we can be sure that she won't cease to exist once we return her to cyberspace. Various tests are being conducted to measure her level of corporeality.
So far we have ascertained that she is capable of consuming food, wine and other intoxicants, and responds positively to pain stimuli. We will keep you informed of our progress.
LOL, an excellent analysis of Caroline so far. But I think you should detain her a little longer...jsut to be certain!
ReplyDeleteYes, such a fine test subject requires a thorough probing.
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ReplyDeletePlease send her back asap. Don't mind if she's marked, especially if they are marks like that. Good job!
ReplyDeleteWill listen to any reasonable ransom demands...
I approve wholeheartedly of your pursuit of scientific knowledge.
ReplyDeleteThe pursuit of scientific investigation of cyberspace to corporeality, especially in the cause of other things corporal, is an honorable and worth while experiment. Please don't tell Dr. Malford (my fictional headmistress) about it though.
ReplyDeleteMy complements to your test subject, Ms Grey.
Prefectdt
This is an example of the kind of research I'd like to be doing. I have a laboratory in my basement, soundproofed and secure, and many experiments I want to conduct on Pandora and Caroline.
ReplyDeleteI hope that doesn't sound Tooo creepy. :)
If you can manage to look past that bum you can actually see tears!
ReplyDeleteEmmaJane - we ended up detaining her just long enough to be certain that she was real (if she wasn't, why was her hangover as bad as mine?) - but then she somehow, magically, disappeared back into the fictional world inside my computer, thereby thwarting the entire experiment! MUST DO BETTER NEXT TIME. (Also, the daft wench took my house keys with her. Does that mean they're now fictional too?)
ReplyDeleteFrank: Dunno how long the marks actually lasted on the Trademark Butt of Steel, but hopefully she returned to your strange imaginary internet-land in one piece! Thankyou for the loan of her company: it was delightful :)
Prefectdt: Oh, I dunno. I think administering spankings is just as valid a test of corporeality...
Dana: What can I say? Anything for science! (I envy you your basement.)
Caroline: Eeeee, I forgot to mention the tears! Ah well, I shall relinquish the honour to you. After all, they were your tears. (MISS YOU.)