101 uses for a ceiling fan

D has just moved house, and his new bedroom contains a large ceiling fan similar in shape to the one pictured above. When he moved in each of the fan blades was decorated with a rather tasteless fussy Victorian motif.

Being the resourceful fellow that he is, D decided that rather than messing around with repainting them, the easiest way of removing the offending design was to unscrew each of the fan blades and flip them over, so that only the plain white side on the reverse was visible. I was lying on the bed reading while all this was going on.

I looked up to find him contemplating the large, thin, round-edged piece of wood in his hand. He met my eyes with a grin. It was clear that we were both thinking the same thing - and I wasn't at all sure how I felt about the idea.

Happily for me, my parents were visiting and so the experiment was postponed until we had the house to ourselves. We contented ourselves with discussing the possibility of rotating all the blades 90 degrees, suspending a girl from the ceiling and letting the fan mechanism do all the work. (It wouldn't work, unless you wired the fan to reverse direction after each quarter-circle, and then the speed at impact would be decreased.)

But of course, I wasn't allowed to escape entirely. The next day found me bent over a couple of pillows naked from the waist down, with my dear boyfriend brandishing a large, crisp wooden paddle painted on one side with a particularly tasteless old-fashioned pattern. I guess this is what comes of asking the internet to send me new paddle designs.

It stung well enough, once he'd got the hang of controlling it without a proper handle. There was no thud to the sensation at all, and although it hurt, the pain didn't seem proportional to the size of the thing. Certainly not as much as I was afraid it would: it made an almightly whoosh coming down, but it seemed to be all bark and no bite. D said afterwards that it was a bit unwieldly, which I suppose might be something to do with air cushions - is that why so many wooden paddles have holes in them?

So there you have it: ceiling fan blades aren't quite as scary as they look. Even so, I'm not particularly sad that this one is staying on the ceiling in future!

gift-wrapped

Happy Christmas! I hope you're all enjoying your holiday. I had a lovely time spending the last few days with my family, my partners and my best friend, eating and drinking far too much.

In the evening we watched Hot Fuzz, the latest Simon Pegg film, about an over-achieving metropolitan police officer transferred to a sleepy rural village. I hadn't seen it before and thought it was brilliantly funny. I particularly appreciated Jim Broadbent as Chief Inspector Butterman, head of the sinister Neighbourhood Watch. Now there's an actor who can project authority. The character starts off as endearing and twinkly, but as the film progresses he becomes increasingly commanding. It's all in the eyes and the voice. I'm not sure I'd be so keen on encountering Inspector Butterman in one of his axe-wielding moments (I'll leave that to the more adventurous Niki Flynn), but I certainly wouldn't mind going over his knee.

In keeping with the spirit of the season, I'm posting a couple of free photos of me tied up with ribbon. I'm afraid these aren't from this year - the observant among you will notice that these shots were taken before I got my tattoo. But I'm currently in the process of booking some shoots in January, so I should have some new photos for you soon. In the meantime, I'll keep raiding the archive for pictures to keep you entertained :)

I haven't been giftwrapped and put under the tree yet ... but my parents have gone home now, and there are nine whole days of Christmas left :) I'll let you know how we get on.



Best wishes from all of us for a happy and spanking-filled new year :)

"Whipping cures depression"

I recently found this link to what appears to be a genuine (if slightly out-of-date) news article:

Whipping therapy cures depression and suicide crises

Siberian scientists believe that addiction to alcohol and narcotics, as well as depression, suicidal thoughts and psychosomatic diseases occur when an individual loses his or her interest in life. The absence of the will to live is caused with decreasing production of endorphins - the substance, which is known as the hormone of happiness. If a depressed individual receives a physical punishment, whipping that is, it will stir up endorphin receptors, activate the “production of happiness” and eventually remove depressive feelings.

Russian scientists recommend the following course of the whipping therapy: 30 sessions of 60 whips on the buttocks in every procedure. A group of drug addicts volunteered to test the new method of treatment: the results can be described as good and excellent.

The idea that a the occasional beating can be good for your mental health isn't really news to us. But masochists and kinksters aren't the only people who have tapped into the human endorphin response. Flagellation has a place in a number of religious traditions - medieval Catholicism, Tibetan Buddhism, Gardnerian Wicca. The euphoria triggered by exercise is similar, I think.

I'm not sure I'm convinced that this treatment has a universal application, though. I don't really understand the psychology, but it seems plausible that there's some correlation between people exhibiting the self-destructive behaviours described above, and people who will respond well to endorphin manipulation. Note that the article says that the treatment was only tested on volunteers - that has to skew the results slightly.

”The whipping therapy becomes much more efficient when a patients receives the punishment from a person of the opposite sex. The effect is astounding: the patient starts seeing only bright colors in the surrounding world, the heartache disappears, although it will take a certain time for the buttocks to heal, of course,” Sergei Speransky told the Izvestia newspaper.

Well, I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that sounds familiar :) But what about people who are attracted to the same sex, eh? It bugs me when queerness is ignored by sex psychologists.

Nonetheless, I have to applaud the courage and open-mindedness of the research team. It would be great if the positive results of a healthy kink life were more widely recognised, particularly by the medical profession; if popular opinion saw what we do as part of a sane, affirming, balanced lifestyle, and not a symptom of being wrong in the head. I wonder if this Dr. Speransky is one of us?

white socks and the strap

As a spanking model, one of the strange things about being away for a few months is that when you start looking back at blog posts you missed, you can be startled by unexpected photos of yourself.

I came across this photo in the Spanking Online blog, and was surprised to realise I hadn't seen it before. My site memberships all expired long ago, so blogs and free galleries are the only way I can see the results of shoots I did earlier this year. This set is from Spanked Schoolgirl, and if you like strappings and schoolgirls in white socks, you might enjoy the rest of this free gallery.



(Look at those bruises! It's slightly shocking - I haven't been bruised in months, despite playing fairly regularly these days. Clearly I should be trying harder ...)

"a design paddle pattern"

I get a lot of spam, and checking my email is usually an exercise in wedding out the genuine mails from the randomly-generated ones. It's normally quite straightforward: I tend to read anything with "spanking" or "shoot" in the title. Anything about penises, investments or gambling is deleted without further ado.

Sometimes, however, the internet throws you curve balls. I recently received an email with the promising subject line a design paddle pattern. I opened it with excited anticipation. Maybe a reader of this blog had come up with an ingenious way of constructing paddles, and wanted me to publicise their invention to the world? Maybe someone had sent me their idea for a paddle designed specifically for my own bottom? Disappointingly, however, it turned out to contain another string of meaningless gibberish. A coincidence - unless spammers getting more adept at catering to our tastes.

I keep wanting to see that new paddle design now. Do any of you have any devious new ideas for spanking devices in the depths of your imagination? If so please share them, my curiosity has been awakened :)

St Trinian's

I've been lurking and reading a few blogs recently, but I haven't seen this mentioned. What do you make of it?



It seems to me like a bit of a missed opportunity - the trailer lost me about halfway through (about at the point they started talking about stealing paintings rather than the state of discipline in the school). And Colin Firth's opening line was so promising, too: "I believe that our nation's schools have been blighted by the false kindness of namby-pamby policies for far too long." Mmm. It's a good premise, but I suspect we perverts are going to have to re-imagine it if we don't want to be disappointed. I wonder if I could persuade any of my producer friends to do a remake?

(Yes, I'm back, I think. I'm not promising I'll post every day, but I keep thinking of things I want to write about, and this seemed as good a place to start as any. I've missed you.)

Hiatus

Hey people.

I'm very sorry I've been away so long without explanation. I really am. I should at least have posted announcing an official hiatus before now. I know that some of you have been genuinely worried by my absence, and I feel very touched by your concern - it was irresponsible to leave you hanging so long. Thanks for caring, and for checking back here. It means a lot.

Here's a brief summary of what's happened in my life since June:

Tom (that's Mr. C, my dom and long-term partner), and I took some time apart after various difficulties made our relationship unsustainable. It was intended to be a temporary break while we both sorted out heads out and made some changes, and we hoped to renegotiate whether we could restart our relationship come November.

Although Tom and I had split up, I was very lucky to have the continued love and support of my other partner, D. I leaned on D a lot during this difficult time, and our D/s relationship strengthened a great deal. However, the CP kink has always been Tom's thing more than D's (D is very kinky, but his focus tends to be a lot more on headgames than pure CP), and while I was missing Tom so much, I backed off from the spanking scene pretty much entirely. I haven't done any modelling shoots since June, and I've barely kept touch with my friends on the scene, let alone updated my blog and website. What play D. and I did enjoy during this period, I wanted to keep private. After the collapse of my D/s relationship with Tom I wasn't emotionally ready to present a public face as a submissive or a spankee.

After taking the time we needed, Tom and I are now seeing each other again on a tentative basis, although we're not officially back together. My relationship with Tom has always been fiery; he was my first Dom when I was only 19, and since then we've split up and got back together more than once. We still have some problems to work out, but we feel very strongly that we do belong together, and we're dedicated to sorting through each difficulty as it comes. We each have a temper - the classic artistic temperament - but I have faith that our compatability and our love for each other will see us through ... even if we're still squabbling when we're old and wrinkly :) Our intention is to gradually develop a D/s relationship again, alongside my continued submission to my ever-loving D. This will, however, take time. I'm not sure how much of that journey I'll be able to write about here - I intend to ask both of them before making anything public.

I'm not ready to start modelling again yet - while Tom and I are still rediscovering each other I have a strong urge to keep my kink private. Plus I'm out of practice - D. has never particularly favoured the heavy CP play that Tom and I enjoy; his preference is more for psychological and humiliation games than extended punishment scenes. My bottom is more sensitive now than it was a few months ago, and I don't want these new experiences to be constrained by having to stay unmarked for shoots. Once things are more settled, I hope to start modelling again at some point in the new year.

While things are still so tentative, I can't promise that I'll start writing here again regularly. I recently moved house, I'm very busy with a new job, and I'm travelling quite a lot over the next couple of months. But I do miss posting here, and I will try to drop in occasionally when I have something to say. However, I'm not ready to commit to a regular posting schedule yet.

So, that was my summer. How was yours?

Spanksy

I was walking a familiar route through Shoreditch recently when I saw the following new graffiti:



The style is very reminiscent of Banksy - I've seen quite a bit of his work in that part of town, so it's possibly genuine (although of course, there are a lot of copycats around).

I didn't know he was into spanking, though.

ps. Apologies if you have difficulty accessing the images on my blog over the next 24 hours - the domain name has just been renewed, and things might take a while to catch up.

Spanked by the machine

The webmaster of ChimeraBondage, knowing how intense I found my shoot with them, has sent me a couple of preview images of me being paddled by the spanking machine:



You can see more of me (and the machine) in this promo video:

DVD releases

I recently saw the sleeve design for my first ever feature-length CP film :) Thomas Cameron and I filmed this last September with Roué Productions, and it's due for release soon in America. (Yes, I've emailled them to point out the typo.) Hopefully it'll become available in the UK as well, but I guess it's dependent on what happens with the new legislation.

Modelling is a slow-winded business in general - it's quite normal to wait months between shooting and seeing the final product online. Although of course it varies between sites - some shoot further in advance than others. It is strange, though, that of the five DVDs I've filmed this year, only one of them is available, and the other four will be in production for months yet. (There's a full filmography in my Spankingart Wiki article.) The four films awaiting release (including the Roue DVD shown above) are the work I'm proudest of in my career so far. The stories are very close to my heart, and I was involved in the writing of all of them. It's in full-length movies that I've been most able to explore the complex depths of my fantasies. I'm impatient to show them to the world :)

28 strokes later

After all that, I hope this is worth the wait :)

Many thanks to my two intrepid tops/cameramen for all their hard work and moral support. And, of course, to the seven generous contributors who made this possible - Lofty, Bob76, Hamish31, Cee_Jay, Spike, Al and MarkF. Thanks, guys :) I hope you enjoy the clip.

Technical difficulties

I've managed to edit the Cane for Life video clip using some downloaded software called Avid Free DV (my budget unfortunately limiting me to free online options). It took a while to figure out - I've never done anything like this before. However, having started with a 78mb .avi file, I can't seem to save the edited version at anything less than 1gb, whatever file format I save as.

This is stupidly huge - cutting it into smaller clips won't make a difference; there must be something wrong with the save process which means it's not being compressed properly. The original .avi file is about 8 minutes long, and before I can put it online I need to trim less than a minute off the beginning and end (any other editing is windowdressing). Can anybody help?

Fast-forward?

I've been avidly following the recent blog posts by Adele and Niki about their experience filming for Lupus. If you haven't been reading, it's fascinating stuff. (And hot, naturally - I was particularly taken by the leg restraints in this photo...)

I'm still undecided about whether I'm going to brave the wolves myself at some point. Niki just about had me persuaded, but recent relationship turmoil means I'm going to wait until things have resolved themselves, before embarking on that adventure.

Yesterday Adele wrote that her love for Lupus films was more despite the severity of the canings than because of it:

The harshness of the floggings, the marks and the screams tend to be too much for me; the occasional trickle of blood makes me cringe. The action scenes are supposed to be the focal point of any spanking video, and yet - unless I’m writing a review of the film - I usually watch them on fast-forward.

Today, spankee blogger Michelle commented that she'd be much more inclined to bend over for a caning if she could fast-forward it. I imagine that quite a few spankees would agree with her - the most intense parts of a punishment are for many people (myself included) the anticipation and fear beforehand, and the sense of relief, catharsis and achievement afterwards, as well as having pretty marks to admire and to serve as a reminder.

But you know, if I was given the option, I don't think I'd take it. Maybe it's that I'm a masochist - I can enjoy pain sensations on a sexual level (although it depends entirely on context) and given a high enough dose, the endorphines can carry me into a trance state and make me fly. Or maybe it's that, for me, the afterglow is meaningless without having waited and struggled and sobbed through every painful moment of the punishment?

So tell me - am I alone in this? If you could fast-forward a caning, so that everything happened as normal and it hurt just as much, but the caning itself was over quicker, would you do it? Or would it just not be the same?

Cane for Life photos

Sunday was a crazy, busy, dramatic day.

The most important business was the Cane for Life. (We'd all but started the previous day, including me spending quite a long time waiting for the caning and getting myself into the right headspace to accept it, when D. realised that his camera battery was dead. Ho hum. He plugged it in to charge overnight and reconvened the following day. I'm a model, not a filmmaker, but I really didn't expect to face this many difficulties trying to film a single caning!)

I'm not sure that I'd say the logistics of filming it were harder than the caning itself, however. I was right to spend some time working myself up to it - it was hard. But in the end, there was no point waiting any longer. Afterwards, even though I was sore, I felt a real sense of achievement. I was certainly very glad that it was over!





Unfortunately, I didn't get long to enjoy the afterglow, as I had to deal with another very significant and upsetting event. I'm not sure how much I'll be posting to this blog over the next few weeks, but I'll try to get online now and again.

Before I disappear, however, I have a video to post of the entire caning, which I just need to edit. As soon as I've managed this (I'm having a bit of difficulty with the software) I'll post it online for all to see, free of charge, as a thankyou for being so patient during this unexpectedly difficult month.

Lessons in bondage

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Waiting for the cane

Many apologies to those still waiting for the charity caning photos and video; unforeseen circumstances prevented us from carrying it out two Sundays ago (there have been rather too many of those lately). It's taking longer to organise than we'd hoped, but I haven't forgotten. I can't believe it's been four weeks already since the race - I've been rushed off my feet. I did three full day spanking shoots in June (Northern Spanking, Control and Reform, and Spanking Online) and I didn't want to risk being marked for any of them. (As Mr C has pointed out, there have also been other reasons making it harder for the three of us to get together - and of course, the presence of both my lords is essential).

Anyway, enough excuses. It's now scheduled for Saturday, and as far as I know there are no other plans for this weekend which might cause disruption. I'll probably still be marked from my shoot this Thursday, but I'm sure you'd prefer us not to delay on that account.

Many thanks for your patience on this, and I'm sorry for making you wait a little longer. I'm looking forward to a quieter period in which the three of us have more time to play together; I've been missing it.

On the subject of waiting, here's a picture from a shoot earlier this year:

Busy girl

First off, I'm sorry to keep you all waiting for updates on the Cane for Life. Rest assured I haven't forgotten about it; it was originally scheduled to take place on the 9th, at the end of my shoot with Northern Spanking, to take advantage of their superior camera technology. Unfortunately we ran out of time that day, and since I was away at a festival last weekend, this coming Sunday is the next chance we'll have.

I'm a little nervous about this, as it'll mean receiving my strokes on top of the damage from the interrogation shoot we have planned with new site Control and Reform on Saturday. I'm not sure how severe the punishment in this shoot will be, but Mr C and I have come up with an intense psychological torture plot for the film, and I was hoping to have my limits pushed on the day. Perhaps I'm being over-ambitious, but it should be interesting. Thanks for your patience, anyway, and hopefully I won't keep you waiting much longer :)

While I'm on the subject of forthcoming shoots, take a look at this video clip:

This spanking machine is a new invention from the master of gadgets who runs Chimera Bondage. We were exchanging emails about my doing a self-bondage/CP shoot for the site, and when he found out that spanking machines were a major fantasy of mine, he went away and made this one for me.¹ How amazing is that?

I am so turned on by this prospect that I can't quite believe it. I keep re-watching the clip and imagining myself, bent over a trestle, cuffed at the ankles and wrists, mouth gagged and nipples clamped, on the receiving end of that paddle swing. And melting.

Of course, I'm also absolutely terrified. But therein lies the interest ... right?


[1] Well, for the site actually. I won't get to take it home with me after the shoot. More's the pity: my Lords have already started discussing the various merits of a spanking machine controllable remotely via an internet connection.

Race for Life - aftermath

Well, that weekend was epic. Saturday was pretty hectic for me (the curse of living a double life) so I entrusted my gorgeous guest Adele to the care of Mr C for the afternoon while I got some work done. By the time they joined me in the evening I was more than a little manic. The combination of tiredness and being utterly wired about the race the next day meant we stayed up talking for far longer than we should have. When we had to get up at 7 o' clock the next morning, I was definitely feeling the lack of sleep.

But once we got to the race starting line and saw everyone gathering and getting ready, my tiredness evaporated. There were hugs all round, lots of encouragement and laughter and daft antics. It was so lovely to see all the girls I haven't seen for ages, and to get to know those I hadn't met before.

It was a hot morning: I was feeling sweaty before we even started. The streets were buzzing with thousands of women, all wearing the matching Race for Life signs holding names of loved ones (and some awesome women who were survivors of cancer, racing for themselves). Reading those signs, or just registering the continual stream of them out of the corner of my eye, was one of the most moving things about the whole experience for me.

A group of us decided to walk the distance rather than run it, to support the girls who were injured. (Although certain people¹ were so full of energy that they were running circles around us the whole way.) Even so, the walking pace was a tight one - we were continually egged on by the crowds behind us, the supporters waving at the sidelines, the marshalls shouting encouragement as we passed each kilometer mark, and our own high spirits.

It was an amazing high. We joked and took the piss, admired the view of the scantily-clad girls in front of us (and aimed the occasional smack when a bouncing target was too close to resist¹). Whenever we saw someone we recognised in the sidelines they were engulfed with hugs and kisses from a dozen overexcited girls. (And if they were carrying a camera, we bared our panties in a group salute.) We all made that extra push to run the last stretch - and every single one of us finished! We were met across the finishing line with medals, bottles of water, champagne (courtesy of Lady Penelope - thankyou, Parker!) and a whole bunch of lovely people who had turned out to support us.

By this point, I was in serious pain. It was entirely my own fault: I bought shiny new running shoes which I planned, with the best of intentions, to break in while training. Now I'll be completely honest with you all. I didn't do much training. In fact, by the morning of the race, my shiny new trainers were still in their box, unworn. At this point, a sensible person would have worn her old trainers. But I was sleep-deprived, over-excited and partly on autopilot, so I did the utterly daft thing of wearing my new shoes. By the time I'd finished the 5km - never mind blisters - they'd stripped the skin completely from the backs of my heels. Who'd have thought I'd ever be a fashion victim, eh? But I'll know better next time. It just meant I had to wander around the centre of London in my socks for the rest of the day ...

... The rest of the day consisted of celebrations, celebrations and more celebrations! So many lovely people turned out at the pub to congratulate us. There was lots of hugging and kissing, lots of drinking, and planned half a dozen movies for upcoming shoots (they're going to be FANTASTIC, I promise you). I also did an interview for 'The Fetish Channel' (apparently) with Sascha Harvey, which I can't remember very well - I may have been a bit squiffy by that point!

Various people disappeared off to a nudist spa, and Mr C and I were halfway across town to join them before the combined adrenaline and endorphine crash hit me. He had to practically carry me home. I spent the rest of the day in bed or curled up on the sofa feeling completely naff. Still, it was worth it: and every time I look at our fundraising page the high returns :)

By the way, thanks to your donations, I've earned 28 hard cane strokes. That's an astounding £280 purely from the readers of this blog, excluding those who contributed but didn't want it to count towards the caning. Thankyou so much to lofty, Bob76, Hamish31, Cee_Jay, Spike, Al and (last but absolutely not least!) MarkF, who donated a whopping £100 mere minutes before I left the house for the race on Sunday morning. You've done something amazing, guys - and everyone else who contributed, well done and thankyou to all of you :)

The scene is scheduled for the weekend, and there should be a video available for donators, probably with a free clip or some stills for the rest of you. I'll be a lot less thankful come the weekend, I'm sure. But you've done your bit, and now it's my turn to do mine...


[1] Naming no names, *cough* Leia Ann...

'Donate per view'

Wow - clearly the prospect of me getting caned is quite an incentive! I've earned 9 strokes already from your donations; if I continue to be sponsored at this rate, by the race I'll have racked up a 36 stroke hard caning.

I'm strangely conflicted. The idea is terrifying - I know that my Lords will take me absolutely at my word, and hard strokes will mean hard. But the worse the thrashing, the more impressive an amount we'll have raised for charity. Successful fundraising for a good cause - how could I not be delighted? And let's face it, my suffering will be nothing compared to the pain experienced by all the cancer victims and survivors for whom we're running on Sunday.

So far, I'm definitely feeling good about being able to give something back. Cee_Jay, Spike and Al: thankyou :)

A commenter yesterday asked how the caning will be documented. I was planning to post photos to my blog, but D suggested that we video it, and only make the video available to those who have donated. Now, this would rely on my sponsors contacting me with an email address so I can share the clip privately (hint hint!). But I like the idea of a 'donate per view' incentive. Maybe it could even be a regular feature of this blog?

Race Cane for life

Bums on the Run has already raised an amazing amount so far - people's generosity is truly staggering, and all our faith in the spanking scene has been absolutely justified! I was fairly overwhelmed by how quickly we reached our target. And also, I have to admit, humbled: I haven't done anywhere near as much work fundraising as Lucy, Josie and most of the other girls. I've barely done any training (unless you count being thrashed - all that clenching and kicking and wriggling has got to help muscle tone, right?) and will probably spend most of the race wishing I'd done more preparation.

I'll be punished enough for not training harder during the race itself (I do intend to try and run as much of it as I can). However, I'm determined to make as much of a contribution as I can in the short time available. I realise that several of you have already donated, and I'm extremely grateful to all of you. But to those of you who haven't donated yet, for whatever reason, how's this for an offer:

For every £10 donated by readers of this blog between now and the start of the race, I'll take one hard stroke of the cane.

You can donate online here, or by cheque (here for details). Please include "Cane for life" in the comment accompanying your donation to indicate that you would like your contribution to count towards my caning. It would be helpful if you could also leave a comment on this entry stating the amount you've donated. (Wish me luck as well; I'll need it!) Donations which don't include the words "cane for life" will still help raise money to fight cancer, but won't lead to me getting any extra strokes!

The closing time for donations is the race itself - 10am on Sunday 3rd June. Again, any subsequent donations are very much appreciated, but won't translate to cane strokes.



Hopefully this will result in my getting some of the discipline I've so lacked in the training period, and raising some much-needed money for a very good cause. I'm rather nervous about this method of fundraising, but I think I probably deserve a beating for being so slack about this so far. If it gets too harsh, we'll probably split it up into two or more sessions. So don't let concern for me hold you back. I need this to feel like I've gone the extra mile, and every penny you donate really will make a difference.

And to all the kind souls who have already donated - you really are amazing. All the girls taking part are immensely touched by your generosity. It's thanks to you that Bums on the Run are in the top 5 UK contributers, which is an astounding acheievement. Thank you so much, and let's see if by Sunday, we can't raise the bar even higher :)

Schoolwear auctions for charity

Well, the observant among you will have noticed that my auctioned school uniform items went online last week at Bums on the Run. All garments will be sold not in the original packaging and are technically "used"; they've each been worn once by me during the shoot, and have since been washed. Sorry for not posting here about it before - I was away last weekend (and got up to all sorts of kinky fun, which I shall post about in due course).

The auctions actually finish tomorrow, so if you want some high quality authentic school uniform for cheap (or if you like the idea of buying something worn by me!) get yourselves over there and place a bid - anything from £1 will do! There are some fabulous things on offer at the site, including some original CP paintings and 1-2-1s with some of the UK's most gorgeous spankees. So even if schoolwear's not your thing (as if!), do go and see if anything tickles your fancy :)

School Knickers

I recently travelled to sunny Wales to do a fashion shoot for a clothing supplier. Not my normal style of work, no - but when I found out that this shop was a specialist school uniform supplier with an Ebay store called 'School Knickers', how could I refuse?

The store caters to school retaillers, the parents of schoolkids, and us strange perverts who like dressing up in uniform. Catering to the kinky market as well as more innocent buyers is an understandable business decision, and the lovely folks who run School Knickers are no strangers to fetish. As well as modelling their school items (which are absolutely authentic, and as such a bit of a nostalgia trip for me - it's been a while since I wore one of those white P.E. polo shirts!), during the shoot we took some arty 'special interest' shots for sale as prints. Including some of me wearing the most enormous black baggy knickers I have ever seen. They're genuine vintage bloomers, and came up past my navel and halfway down my thighs.

Having worn quite a selection of their stock, I can vouch for its quality. I'd definitely recommend adding their Ebay store to your favourites if you ever buy school uniform. And even if you don't plan to buy anything, you might be interested in scrolling through their catalogue for some free pictures of me modelling a variety of school knickers, school blouses and skirts, summer dresses, socks, tights and gym kit.

The shop owners also very kindly donated several of the items I wore for the shoot to be auctioned on Bums on the Run to raise money for cancer research. So don't place any bids just yet - you might find a used version of the item you want, and the money will go to charity and you'll get good karma! I should be posting links to the auctions tomorrow, so watch this space.

drawings of spankees

Contrary to expectation, it's actually quite rare that spanking photos turn me on. BDSM/bondage pictures more so, but for spanking, I usually need some sort of emotional or narrative context - a video clip with plot, or some text alongside the picture adding extra piquancy to the situation. I frequently appreciate the artistic/erotic merits of spanking photographs on a professional level, but it's one in a hundred that gives me that jolt of arousal.

Drawings, on the other hand, tend to hit the spot much more frequently (as it were). Check out these 'Wicked Wanda' panels posted by Richard Windsor:







The reason why is clearest in the first two: it's the posture of the spankees. There's something about that delightfully graceful helplessness, pert and limp and quivering, which presses all my buttons. The delicately lifted buttocks, the pointed toes and the dangling wrists.

The head-under-desk position in the third image, and proud, sexy poise of the girls who love to be whipped in the fourth, appeal in the same sort of way. (Even without going into all the other fetishes they incorporate. Spanking machines and military inspections: mmmm.)

I don't know if these postures are unrealistic or not. Can the female form actually assume this kind of position? Can a girl's bottom, however nicely rounded, be raised quite so invitingly, or will she break her spine if she tries? I guess the only way to find out is to try to recreate them and see :)

Lookalikes

I sometimes get emails telling me I look exactly like a mainstream actress, and asking me whether we're actually the same person. I may keep the kinkier parts of my career separate from my other professional personae, but I promise I'm not a famous TV actress leading a secret double life :)

These 'lookalikes' always make me blink a bit. Not least because I've rarely heard of them (I'm not great on popular culture). One person told me I was the spitting image of Kelly Brown. I confess I can't see the resemblance. Someone else has asked if I'm actually Susannah Wise. (I'm not, but I wouldn't say no to having her acting career.) Usually these 'doubles' are considerably older than me, American or both.

However, this morning I stumbled across this photo:



It's uncanny. I had to stop and check that no, I've never had blonde highlights, and as far as I know I haven't yet worked for that site. She's not my identical twin, but at least as far as I can tell from this photo, she definitely looks like we could be related.

I can't help wondering whether I have a long-lost cousin who has coincidentally also become a spanking model ... now there's evidence for those who believe that our kink is genetic :)

But who is she? I can't place her on Spanking Server's model page. Can any of you help me out? If nothing else, I want to find out if she'd be interested in making a spanking film about two sisters...

He Hit Me (and it felt like a kiss)

A lot has been going on, my dears. I shan't tell you everything now, but to start making up for my long absence, here is a song for you to download and listen to:

The Crystals - He Hit Me (And It Felt Like A Kiss)

The Wikipedia entry suggests that this song is a journalistic, open-eyed look at domestic violence. The second verse (He couldn't stand to hear me say / That I'd been with someone new, / And when I told him I had been untrue) certainly hints that the violence in the song is that of a jealous, out-of-control husband.

But songs don't have to have only one interpretation. And that of domestic discipline applies just as well. Not a cuckolded husband, but a fair and exacting disciplinarian, giving out the agreed punishment for breaking the rules.

The later verses certainly hint at a more consensual reading. He hit me / And I knew I loved him. / And then he took me in his arms / With all the tenderness there is, / And when he kissed me, He made me his. Even if domestic discipline was not in the minds of the songwriters, these lyrics powerfully relate to those of us who understand that sort of lifestyle. But would a caring dominant ever mete out punishment in anger, as implied by the lines If he didn't care for me / I could have never made him mad?

I know I'm always going to hear D/s in these lyrics. Even if that's not what the song was written about, it's a very pretty description of the power and tenderness of consensual discipline.

Spousal violence, or safe sane and consensual? You decide :)

Tawsed in school uniform

These shots of me and Mr. C were recently taken by a photographer who had never taken spanking pictures before. He asked us to introduce him to the genre, and we were glad to oblige.

Judging from these lovely impact shots, I reckon he'll go far, don't you?

Whipped in the forest

Spring, when a young lady's fancy turns to outdoor spanking. A shoot in my local woodland yesterday (no CP, just me being a filthy hippy and posing naked with trees) put me in the mood to post these:



Pretty, pretty girls. Not just because the top reminds me very much of a friend of mine…

When I spanked Catharine

A recent commenter asked me the following question:

Have you ever felt the slightest twinge of switchiness, or are you truly, madly, deeply submissive at heart?

A lot of chaps would be willing to be your devoted slave, I am sure. But, I wonder how you yourself would feel about this?

It was a tricky one. After some thought, I replied with this answer:

"Interesting question! I have always maintained that I was 100% submissive, but since entering the spanking scene I've become aware that most girls "grow into" their switchiness as they get older. I've already posed for a couple of switch scenes (both with girls) and am perfectly open to the likelihood that I will learn to switch over time.

At the moment, I imagine I'll mainly be doing so for the sake of professional versatility, and to challenge myself as an actress. But who knows? Maybe I'll discover a switch side to myself after all!

I do tend to be a bit more toppy with women, and when I was younger I did once spank a girlfriend as part of our sex games. Partly this is because I'm invariably attracted to submissive women, and so slip quite easily into the role of playful predator in order to seduce them. However, I wouldn't call this 'dominance' in the slightest - just an active sexual pounciness as opposed to passivity!

I can't imagine that my relationships with my two Lords will ever be anything other than 100% D/s, and although we're polyamorous and I'm able to have other lovers, I don't have the time or emotional energy spare for another primary relationship. So as long as the three of us are together, any switching I do is likely to stay in a casual context.

This suits my inclinations far better - I can imagine finding it interesting to play with someone, and hurt them if they like it, but having a slave or a partner who submits outside the bedroom holds no interest for me whatsoever! And at the moment, apart from the feature of my bisexuality described above, I'm submissive in pretty much all of my sexual/romantic interactions, and have very little desire to change that."

Since then, a couple of readers have asked if I have any pictures of me switching. I've dug around in my hard drive, and found these for you. They're from Spanking Images, and the gorgeous girl I'm spanking is Catharine Corbett. I felt very silly doing this set, but we had a lot of fun. I hope you like them!

Easter spanking links

I hope you all had a good Easter! Mine was excellent, if slightly irreligious - I spent most of my Easter Sunday alternating between the jacuzzi, pool and steam room in the company of Mr C, and three exceptionally pretty young people. After we'd thoroughly soaked ourselves we all went for a picnic in a beautiful nearby wood - if it hadn't been for the 5 hour train journey back to London that afternoon, it would have been a perfect day.

Almost. Alas, it didn't involve any spanking. Upon my return to the internets, however, I discovered that Abel and Haron of The Spanking Writers have been getting up to more than enough to keep us all entertained. A kinky friend is staying with them, and her accounts of their weekend are well worth reading. Here are a couple of my favourites so far:

Rods for their own backsides: two reformatory girls cut their own birches for their final Good Friday punishments.

A spanking for Easter: the seasonal celebrations are interrupted when two sisters discover that daddy intends to punish them for breaking their Lenten promises...

Sympathetic as I am to Haron and Martha's plight, I must confess I'm greatly looking forward to reading more of their adventures :)

And finally, the best Easter spanking comic I've ever seen, courtesy of Spanking Blog:

Welts

This is my bottom after a DVD shoot involving hand spanking, tawse, and 36 strokes of the cane, and an evening spent playing afterwards.





That night's play involved a riding crop, and 12 strokes of The Big Black Stick™ - a 48" 14mm dragon cane, stained matte black, which we picked up at the LFF a couple of years ago. It looks worse than it feels, but it feels bad enough, believe me.

The best bit about filming with your Dom is that you can spend the entire day getting worked up, and then go home and show each other exactly how hot you found the on-camera whippings :)

Birthday celebrations, and Bums on the Run

Eep! I'm so sorry about the unannounced hiatus. I've not dropped off the face of the planet, I've just been even busier than usual ... specifically, busy doing lots and LOTS of real life social things which have kept me away from the computer. I could have managed to update if I'd felt less overwhelmed, though, and I'm sorry for neglecting you all.

One of the things I've been busy doing has been celebrating Mr C's birthday, and of course this involved me getting a rather tender bottom at various points. Recent highlights have included:

- being spanked, hairbrushed and caned in a private four-poster bed in the oldest inn in the country (pictures are hopefully forthcoming!)

- being re-introduced me to the joys of riding crops and the Big Black Stick™ (two of my favourite implements, but chances to play with them are rare, given the frequency with which I need to be unmarked for shoots these days)

- an absolutely delicious OTK rulering (with the medium ruler - we haven't played with the yardstick yet...)

- Mr C holding me down while I received my first five bar gate from Mr Chopper (from whom we were obtaining part of his birthday present)

- discovering exactly how hot his wooden paddle can be - when used slowly, and with moderate force. I was lying facedown on the bed, with him pinning both my wrists in the small of my back with one hand. He made me count after each stroke. I gasped my way through the first ten, and when I'd recovered my breath said faintly "...that was really nice". Of course, he responded by gripping my wrists again, giving me a couple of playful smacks, and informing me he was going to give me another ten. Which wasn't what I'd meant. I fought for a bit before remembering my place and submitting with a sob, and the second ten were even hotter than the first. Bloody hurt, though.

- being smacked over jeans with that same paddle by a couple of friends the next day, at least one of whom is vanilla, while I was playing Dromio of Ephesus in The Comedy of Errors. I particularly enjoyed the speech in Act IV, scene 1:

"I have served him from the hour of my
nativity to this instant, and have nothing at his
hands for my service but blows. When I am cold, he
heats me with beating; when I am warm, he cools me
with beating; I am waked with it when I sleep;
raised with it when I sit; driven out of doors with
it when I go from home; welcomed home with it when
I return; nay, I bear it on my shoulders, as a
beggar wont her brat; and, I think when he hath
lamed me, I shall beg with it from door to door."

And, speaking of using beatings to beg with, I've agreed to join 17 other well-known girls on the UK spanking scene in running 5km to raise money for cancer research, with Race for Life. I'm not very fit and I'm really bad at running, but with such a good cause and such good company, how could I refuse?



My fellow masochists are Josie Harrison-Marks, Lucy McLean, Adele Haze, Leia Ann Woods, Sascha Harvey, Jean Bradley, Amy Hunter, Abi Switch, Sam Johnson, Zena Stones, Jadie Reece, Honey Hardy, Isabella Aubourg, Kirstyn Gold, Sharon and Frankie. To find out more, check out the fundraising site Lucy has put together, Bums on the Run.

And if you want to support us all (of course you do!) please, PLEASE sponsor us. You can donate online using this page, and every penny will make a difference.

The website will be frequently updated with blogs, chat and pictures about training for the race and all things spanking, all of it available online absolutely free. If you want to show your appreciation and support our efforts, please donate! You'll be making a real difference. And when we drag our collective bums around that race, we want to know that all you lovely people in the spanking scene are behind us every step of the way.

Actually, if you can get to London, you're more than welcome to come and cheer us on in person on Sunday 3rd June. We'll all be wearing suitably spankable outfits, and you can join us for a drink at an informal party after the race.

And if you can't be in town on the day, it would be fantastic if you could help us raise awareness and support by promoting Bums on the Run - on your website, on your blog, in your newsletter, at your local munch or spanking party.

And, of course, donate!! You'll get good karma, and I promise not to jog so much that my bottom ceases to be wobblesome :)

Rulers

I was in the art supplies shop a while ago to order a canvas, when something caught my eye. Three somethings, in fact.





I know the pictures are a bit fuzzy, but hopefully you can work out what they are. The clever ones among you will be able to work out how long they are, as well.

The littlest is a thin, smacky 30cm with a metal core. It's light, snappy and strangely humiliating, especially when used over the backs of the thighs. The sharp edges of the wood cause a crisp sting.

The middle one is slightly longer and slightly thicker. It's also much stiffer (it doesn't bend at all), the edges are smoothed and rounded, and the whole thing is polished to the smoothest, most silken finish you can imagine. It's like a very long, thin, crisp paddle. I love it :) It doesn't have any numbers or markings, and the fine grain of the wood means being stroked with it is heavenly. This ruler creates a satisfying thwack when used, and causes a deliciously warm sensation that isn't too heavy.

I haven't had the chance to play with the yardstick properly yet, but a few whacks over my combats have demonstrated that when I do, it's going to be quite an experience. It's a similar style of ruler to the 30cm (flexible, smacky, with crisp edges), but it's heavier and longer than a cane, with a lot of weight behind the swing.

Which will teach me to take the initiative buying new implements: when I do discover what it feels like, I'll have no-one to blame but myself.

Superhero spankings

I encountered a couple of startles the other day when a friend linked me to a page of unintentionally funny old-school comicbook panels.



I'll stick with the caption given this by the original article: "It's hard to believe this one is real and that any version of Batman in the last 60 something years would sound natural saying this. But there it is."

And my favourite:



I want a spanking robot.

I suppose I shouldn't really count spanking in retro comics as a 'startle' given how many of them were at it. The spankings in Batman, Superman, Captain America, etc. seem to be intended to humerously represent fairly normal (if more than a little sexualised) gender relations.

But when I showed these to Mr C, he told me that William Marston, the writer of Wonder Woman, was a progressive liberal - and an academic psychologist. Apparently he lived his entire life in a polyamorous D/s triad, and wrote comics as propaganda for BDSM as the ultimate therapy. He truly believed everyone would be much happier if they could embrace their inner sub/inner dom, and live out their fantasies in roleplay scenarios. How cool is that?

Girl Guide update at Spanked Cheeks

Remember that Girl Guide shoot I wrote about last year? Well, thanks to Mr Brushstrokes over at The Spanking Spot, I've just seen a couple of images from the first update at Spanked Cheeks. (I hope he won't mind me reposting them, but I don't have access to the members area myself yet.)

In this set I'm being punished by the delectable Kirstyn Gold. I wish the Guiders in my unit had been as cute as her :)