Strict Prison 4 - preview

A couple of days ago, Pain4Fem sent me the finished trailer for Strict Prison 4. I ended up watching it while Tom was here. I was tired and moody, but I wanted to watch it to see if I'd be happy posting the link for you lot.

"Don't get too mrowly," I warned Tom. We weren't watching it for fun. After the difficulties I'd had with the dialogue, I wanted to cast a professional eye over it.

He was very good, though, and didn't make any comments about how sexy my bottom or the caning was. Just watched me watching it, and at the end, when I tentatively ventured, "Well, that was okay ... I guess?", he assured me it looked really good. Despite myself, I think he may actually be right.

Sadly, I'm under strict instructions from Pain4Fem to wait until the DVD is released on March 5th before I post the trailer. In the meantime, however, they've uploaded some official preview pics to their website:

spanked in jodphurs

My workload has doubled in the last week, which is great in terms of earning money to spend on making spanking films, but less good in terms of having time to blog. Or sleep. I'm contracting in several different offices on different days of the week, and while the work is really cool, I've been mostly running on adrenaline and caffeine. And I was late to work this morning. (I stayed later this evening to make up, though, so that's okay. Right?)

I have not, however, fallen asleep at my desk yet. And hopefully will manage to survive the busy period without doing so. However, if I did, I'd like to think that my employers would handle it like Lady Sonia...



Well, what else would you do if you came into your reception room one morning to discover your stablegirl hungover and dozing when she should be working?



Especially when you have guests arriving any moment? And your stablegirl did exactly the same thing last week? And the week before that?



Well, quite. It's enough to make you wonder if she's doing it deliberately, just because she enjoys bending over your fetchingly-clad knee.



Sadly, reality does not mirror fantasy in this instance. I have neither enjoyed a wild night out this week, nor do I have a boss who looks this hot in jodphurs.

But sometimes it's fun to pretend.

a couple of new blogs

I've added two new blogs to the link list lately, which I can very much recommend:

Caroline Grey - Getting It.
"I get it. Sometimes, I get it good." The first post of Caroline's I read was this light-hearted domestic spanking story, which I found so genuine, so cheerfully romantic, and so very very hot, that I immediately sent the link to Tom with the comment "this made me think of you". Caroline absolutely gets it, in every sense of the word, and although I haven't been reading her long I suspect our kinks have rather a lot in common. You should also read her recent post about girls adventure stories of long ago, especially if your kink first manifested through an over-active imagination and games of make-believe. Caroline is also a minor celebrity in the Irish fetish scene, and rumour has it she'll be making her debut as a spanking model in the not-too-distant future, so I'll be following her adventures with great interest.

Shakespearean Kink
Ophelia is one of the regular commenters on this blog, and she and I have been real life friends for years. We met through a shared interest in theatre, which tends to foster the intense intimacy that you find in scene friendships, especially among people who roleplay together. We have far too many things in common to easily list, but one of them is our shared perspective on polyamory. Ophelia also has two male partners, but unlike me, she's a true switch. She is married to her sub, Feste, and has more recently been learning about submission with her Dom, Puck. Her writing about her kink and her two relationships makes for fascinating reading. Puck has also contributed one entry so far, and I'm hoping to read more from him and Feste in future. Their blog is still fairly new and I don't think they know many people in the spanking blogosphere yet, so please wander over and help them feel welcome. :)

Introducing Jimmy

My plans to produce queer-friendly porn focussing on the female gaze continue apace. On Friday I had the first test shoot for a new site I'm hoping to launch this year. It was photos only, this time, with a new model and a new photographer. I'm very new to this as well, so I wasn't at all sure how it would work out. But it was a promising start, and I'm confident that we'll learn and improve as we go on.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you to young Jimmy Holloway?



Believe it or not, he'd never modelled before. I've been talking to him about it for months, and am extremely gratified that he's finally taken the plunge. He was a natural.





He's also extremely spankable...



I had far more fun playing the top role for this shoot than I'd expected. I think, in fact, I think I might have a little bit of a switch side after all. Some of it was the intense feedback loop I was getting from Jimmy's enjoyment of being spanked. But there was a tiny, gleeful streak of sadism in there as well; sheer delight in making him wriggle and flush, in being able to make him feel the way I I like feeling.

I can't see my switch side surfacing in private any time soon. But on camera? I am very much looking forward to the next time, although I'm nervous about the responsibility and still, irrationally, slightly guilty for hurting Jimmy in the first place, no matter how many times he tells me not to be silly. I'm thrilled that he enjoyed the shoot, though, and that he's interested in working with me again. I think he looks great on camera. Our photographer for the day, Tricia Sullivan, really helped bring him out of himself. I love what she did with the natural light, I think the colours are amazing.

The new site is going to be a while in the making. I'd planned to work on it over the next month or two and hope to launch in April or May, but work has just got really busy and I'm unlikely to have time to devote to my own projects for a while. On the upside, work means money, so hopefully if I defer work on the site til the summer I'll be able to get stuck in with a higher budget and better resources. And more time to plan never hurt anyone. I'm impatient, though!

We do have our first film shoot already booked, so I'll be doing that in a couple of weeks before putting everything on the back burner. I'm so excited about getting started that I might try and find time to squeeze in some editing at the weekends. We'll see. I'll update you all as soon as I have more news :)

the view from the bottom

After my posts about the extreme porn law and the demonstration I attended in Parliament Square, I received an invitation to write a guest post on the issue for Heresy Corner, a UK political blog with an impressive readership. "While I do my research thoroughly, my opinions are theoretical and those of an outsider. You actually live this stuff." the Heresiarch explained in his email. "I was also struck from something you wrote a while ago about how 'sex blogs' are rather cut off from other parts of the blogosphere - and it seems to me that your thoughts deserve a different audience."

I've been pretty over-committed lately, so it took me a while to get back to him. I said I was honoured to be asked, definitely interested, but well aware that my tendency of setting myself ambitious goals in four or five different areas at once leaves me vulnerable to changes of focus, and I have a bad habit of leaving projects unfinished and commitments dangling. The Heresiarch assured me there was no hurry from his point of view, but I shyly asked if he could set me a firm deadline, or it probably wouldn't happen. He was kind enough to oblige, and I said sure, I'd write him something.

I started work on the blog post two days before the deadline. Loads of time, I thought. But first there was the writing block to overcome. Suddenly this felt like a real writing project. I haven't had written a proper article since I was studying. I didn't help matters by looking through the recent posts on Heresy Corner until I felt thoroughly intimidated and uninformed in comparison.

But I chatted to my Doms in IRC, and they both had useful input, and I made a lot of notes about censorship and democracy and media responsibility. Once I started writing, I quickly realised that I had enough thoughts on this topic to fill a small book - particularly since I'd been told I shouldn't assume that my audience was familiar with kink, so I had to start from scratch with explaining where I'm coming from, and challenging some of the misconceptions which played a part in getting this legislation passed.

I finally finished it, after cutting it down to about a third of its original size, three days after the deadline. So I probably deserve a spanking for that. And I have at least two more articles I could write with the material I collected. But I'm pretty happy with the post that went up on Heresy Corner yesterday. It's not a bad start.

The View from the Bottom - An insider's take on spanking, S&M and the new porn law.

two valentines

I've been intending to write all week about the lovely Valentines weekend I had with the boys. About being surprised by D. when we got home from a delicious dinner, encountering him in the living room with the paddle, the yardstick and the cane already laid out ready to use. Being kissed by him. Told to bend over with my hands on the sofa, and warmed up until my whole body was humming and my knees were buckling.

He let me lay myself over the arm of the sofa, resting my weight so I could close my eyes and let the sensations wash over me. I wriggled and moaned and arched my hips. When he went next door I stayed where I was put, all my usual impatience drained away, content to wait and see what he had in store for me.

I didn't recognise the soft, shivery sound that came next. It wasn't until I felt the ice-cold tip of it draw a silvery trail on my sensitised skin that I whimpered with recognition. Swords have been part of my kink for years, and I hang onto every word when D. talks about holding past lovers at swordpoint, threats and coercion and cold steel pressing against the vulnerable hollow of her throat. But I've never felt one before. He teased me, slowly dragging the sharp point over the curve of my ass. I could have melted. When he started to use the flat, tapping it with increasing force, I was so turned on it took a while to register that the strokes weren't really having much effect. The blade held no sting at all; even when he used more force the impact wasn't as interesting as I'd hoped. But the kiss of the point, leaving trails of promise on my skin, made me tremble with desire.

The next night Tom and I went out to a fetish club. It was a wild night. Lots of kisses, lots of friends and lots of unexpected encounters. I didn't get as much private time with him as I'd have liked, but we stole moments where we could and I think he still managed to give the crowd a show.

When we first arrived, dropped off our things in the cloakroom and fixed our outfits, the first thing we did was find the dungeon. It was crowded already, but there was a leather-padded trestle in one of the alcoves which I quickly found myself bent over. Once I was in position my head was mere inches from the randoms on the sofa, who weren't really into it; I heard laughter and the comment " ... a bit too much like grammar school!" I closed my eyes, willing away the spectators, focussing on the space containing Tom and me.

He started to cane me. Lightly, at first, with a thin crook-handled cane. I knew he wouldn't be able to hear my whimpers and I was oddly reluctant to make a fool of myself in front of the sofa people, so I shut my eyes and focussed all my attention on the sensations, trying to communicate my responses to him physically. I tossed my head, wiggled on the trestle, twisted away from the harder strokes and, when every so often the pain jolted pleasure down my nerves like electricity, rose towards them. After each set of twelve he checked in on me, bent his face to mine to hear anything I needed to say, stroked my hair. I didn't need to say anything. I was fine. I was in the zone.

I can't remember how many strokes he gave me. 48? They weren't hard; just enough to set my head spinning and nerves tingling. Afterwards we found another couple to play with, and I held hands with a gorgeous girl as her partner cropped her through her latex. I caught her face and kissed her as she writhed under the strokes.

Later, I found myself kneeling on one of the seats, face to the wall, my skirt hitched up around my waist. I could only imagine the full moon of my bottom as it must appear to people walking by. Tom attended to it with hand, wooden hairbrush, and the cane again. I floated in darkness, aware of nothing but his touch, each stinging impact going up like a flare. I squirmed away from the stinging, spanking brush, but each smack illuminated our connection, keeping me linked to him from my shadowy half-world with my face to the wall. The half-heard remarks of passers by drifted past my consciousness. I flushed when the couple sitting next to us commented on my bottom, and Tom responded, discussing me as if I wasn't there.

It was easy for me, last weekend, to close my eyes and trust that they would take me somewhere worth travelling to. The journey wasn't an arduous one. The pain was welcome; it represented their attentiveness, their gift of love to me. I squirmed my appreciation. And, afterwards, showed my gratitude in all the ways I know best.

This isn't the only time of year I feel so cherished, by any means. But it's nice to have the excuse.

hold on tight ...

It's not unusual for the spanking to be the least painful aspect of a CP shoot. I have back problems and inconveniently tight hamstrings; if my trapezius muscle isn't aching, then my legs are usually trembling from the effort of touching my toes. As such, I prefer positions that grant me some degree of stability. Being able to rest my weight on a trestle or desk is ideal. I prefer to lean on my forearms than my hands, as it makes my bottom stick out more attractively as well as taking some of the weight off my thighs.

I would find it very difficult indeed to lean on a a moving handhold. And yet that's exactly what the spankee in this picture seems to be doing:



What is she holding onto? Winches of some kind? Weights? Either way, they don't look very steady. They look, in fact, like they'd wobble crazily from side to side unless she kept her poise perfectly symmetrical.

Perhaps that's why the top is holding tight onto her shoulder, to keep her in place when the blows start to fall?

the warning

I love this set with Kami Robertson at Bars and Stripes. She plays a reporter who has infiltrated the prison, and tries to tell the outside world of the atrocities going on within its walls. Of course she's caught. And of course she's punished. The best kind of punishment, in my opinion, where the valiant young woman is unjustly targeted for trying to do the right thing.









Kami looks beautiful as always, but it's the implicit violence in these images that makes my breath catch in my throat. The take-down is something you see more in bondage porn than spanking, but I love it. And Kami's slight figure enhances the impression of vulnerabilty. I couldn't do a series like this unless I found some massive tops to contrast with my height.

The last picture is my favourite. The sense of movement and tension in the body language is amazing. I don't need to see the actual spanking, really: it's is secondary to the act of being caught, outnumbered and immobilised, stripped of your dignity by unstoppable figures.

(Photos via The Spanking Spot)

Wheatley Manor

I've just found out about an exciting thing. Northern Spanking are releasing their first feature-length film. The stars, of course, are the four best spanking actresses (in my opinion) in the UK: Amelia-Jane Rutherford, Niki Flynn, Leia Ann Woods, and Amy Hunter. And the inestimable Stephen Lewis, although from the look of the promo pics the girls hardly need his help. The title? Wheatley Manor.



I wasn't involved in this project, but I've seen the teaser site Northern Spanking have put online. And I'm excited. Aren't you excited?



Paul, Lucy and the girls will be at the Shadow Lane Spanking Convention on Friday 6th March, to answer your questions and whet your appetites (and hopefully sell some DVDs). I can't justify the trip this year, but I hope some of you can make it to Las Vegas and tell me all about it.

In the meantime, I'm awaiting this DVD release with baited breath. I don't buy many, but this will definitely be one of the honoured few.

on not being a moth

Talking about model names, Ludwig has asked me about mine:

Speaking of surnames: the inspiration for "Pandora" seems fairly obvious, but where did "Blake" came from? I've been meaning to ask this for some time. Or is it a secret? My theory is that, since you are an artist, the surname might come from English poet and painter William Blake (1757-1827). I'd love to see if it is correct...

I'll start with the Pandora, which is, indeed, obvious. The first human woman, a "beautiful evil" concocted by Zeus to torment the race of men, who releases forbidden gifts into the world. However problematic I might find the gender theory of these myths, they're certainly powerful.

I knew from the start I wanted a mythical name, preferably from the Classical corpus. Most of them sound pretty obscure these days, and I wanted a name which is still used today. My shortlist boiled down to Diana, Selene, Penelope, Maia and Pandora, and after some thought I chose the latter. (Although when Spanking Online wanted me to use a different name for my first shoot with them, I went with Penelope.)

Coming up with the dreadful "Pandora's Bot" pun definitely sealed the decision. It took me a while to get there, though. When I started modelling, I was mostly doing art nude or glamour photoshoots, and I didn't know what direction my career would go in. I knew I was interested in erotic photography but I'd been modelling for a year before I did my first spanking shoot. When I chose the name, I was considering the possibility that I might choose to do hardcore porn work. In which case "Pandora's box" would have been an even more obvious terrible pun. ;)

In the event, I quickly worked out that wasn't my thing, and that spanking definitely was. If I'd known from the start I was going to be a spanking model I'd have picked something more "normal", a name that could as easily sound like a girl in your class as a porn model. But when I started out, I didn't know what direction I would go in.

Once I'd picked "Pandora", I needed a surname that fitted. I knew I wanted something very traditionally English, to balance out the Greek first name. Lots of characters from Regency and Victorian novels were considered and rejected. I remember a conversation with D. where I was going through English place names,and at one point he burst out "I am NEVER spanking someone called PANDORA PADDINGTON!" After that I stuck to shorter names.

Ludwig will be gratified to know that his guess about my eventual choice was spot on. I've always admired the Romantic movement, and was very into William Blake's work as a teenager. I love his art, his poetry and especially his illustrated books - and with well-known titles like Songs of Innocence and Experience and The Marriage of Heaven and Hell, how could I resist?

It wasn't until after I'd chosen my name, done a few spanking shoots, created my website and started a blog that I realised the other meaning of the name. In the early days, I checked my Google rankings and discovered the Pandora Pinemoth, whose scientific name is Coloradia Pandora (Blake) - Blake being the entymologist who classified it in 1863.

Sheer coincidence. But pleasing, nonetheless.

Mr M

Continuing the theme of hot male spankers, I've recently noticed a cute top working for Real Spankings, known as Mr M¹. Apparently he's been shooting with them a while, but he first came to my attention the other week in an update from Spanking Bailey. He's youthful, good looking, and he has long hair, which goes a long way in my book.



Plus, he seems to be absolutely expert with a belt. I suspect Bailey wasn't impressed that his left wrist was the injured one when they filmed this set:







The good news is that appears in a whole load of free galleries from Real Spankings. (I know. I looked.) The bad news, inevitably, is that most of them focus on the spankee, so I haven't been able to ogle as much as I'd like. But I've seen enough to know that he's a commanding, accurate top who plays hard. Hard enough that resulting paddle burn is uncomfortable to look at. Which is, you know. Hot. :)

I waded through a tonne of photos showing his hand and the back of his head to find these shots, so I hope you like them:





The first photo is fromthis free spanking gallery, and the second two are from this one. Enjoy :)

1. No full name, sadly.² Although I suppose I can't really complain about that until I've persuaded D. to give me a a decent pseudonym to use for him ;)

2. I was wrong about this. Thanks to Ludwig, I am now up to speed: his full name is Michael Masterson, and he co-founded and co-runs Real Spankings. Apparently I've been surfing the internet with my eyes closed.

hot male spankers: Mario

I like men.

I mean, I like girls as well - I like girls a lot - but my two primary partners are both male. When I'm watching spanking porn, if I'm identifying with the victim rather than watching voyeuristically, usually I prefer M/f to F/f. Perhaps it's because I like watching a genuine erotic charge between spanker and spankee, and however often porn includes girls kissing for the cameras, real sexual chemistry is sadly less common in F/f than M/f.¹

Of course, I also like to see a non-consensual sexual charge, where the spanker's lechery is unreciprocated by a creeped-out and reluctant victim. (It's not easy to find decent porn with this dynamic where I can assure myself that the model wasn't creeped-out and reluctant, but that's why spankee-led sites which emphasise the models' desires and models' voices are so brilliant.) And a lot of the time, I have to tap into that non-consent kink even if I'm not sure the site's values are completely ethical, because if I'm not at all attracted to a male spanker, it's the only way I can connect to a sexual charge from them.

The problem is - and, well, there's no way of saying this that doesn't sound rude, but it's true - there are far fewer hot male spankers in the industry than there are hot female spankers. I would go as far as to say that all female spankers are hot;² far fewer of the men press my buttons. Part of this problem is the anonymity of male models: without a name, a face, a personality, a voice, it's hard to connect with a disembodied spanking arm. It's not all that bad - at their best, male spankers are authoritative, powerful, capable and convincing tops.³ Which is great, and if they're too old for me to fancy them then they're still perfect for those Headmaster fantasies. But I like my spankings sexy, and maybe it makes me shallow or picky, but I just can't get that sexual charge if the male spanker isn't cute.

In real life, I like my men to be energetic. I like lean, slinky men with cheekbones and hipbones as sharp as their wit. I like handsome, kind bears who can soothe me with their arms and with their voice, handle me as gently as if I were a little girl. Above all I like physically powerful, dynamic, expressive men. Older than me, but still youthful and vigorous. In real life, I'm not interested in the Dirty Old Man character that has been a staple of spanking porn since the Blushes era.⁴

I can discuss trends in spanking models till my cheeks are pink, but your patience is about to be rewarded. This is all by way of introduction to some kinky pictures that pressed my hot buttons.

This update is from Spanked Call Girls. Apparently the spanker is Rosario Stone's real-life husband, which is a quick way of upping the sexual chemistry in a scene. He's called Mario, and I have to admit it's nice to see a male spanker with an actual name. Mario Stone is good-looking, he's got a focus and intensity in his expressions which I love, and he's got the body language absolutely nailed. Something about the shoulders. That sense of determination and strength. Yum. :)







And there's a free gallery here. Don't say I'm not good to you.

In fact, a quick nose has revealed that this beautiful couple switches, and they've done at least one F/m scene for Clare Spanks Men. Wow! Now that's hot. :)

Of course Mario's not the only fit bloke in the spanking industry, but I've gone on long enough, so I'll save the rest for another day.

1. Audrey and Abigail's domestic discipline site Spank That Brat are an obvious exception to both generalisations, and I commend them for it.

2. All females in the industry are hot. Conforming to conventional beauty standards is a pre-requisite for this job, which is one of the reasons I am drawn to the work of fat models, models of colour, genderqueer models, models with stretchmarks and big noses. They're bucking the trend, and that takes courage. (Anyway, I belong to at least the last two camps.) Porn is great because so much of it is home-grown, and real bodies and real faces are in my opinion much hotter than the sanctioned, identical bodies and faces re-used over and over by Hollywood and big television.

3. At their worst, they're unpaid spankophile amateurs with no acting experience. Or the producer and his brother. Or Cameraman 2. I don't want to insult any of the male tops reading this, but I don't mean you - I'm sure you can all think of studios who prioritise convenience/cheapness over quality in their choice of male models.

4. I was about to say "and before", but now I come to think of it, all the vintage M/f spanking photos I can think of off-hand have vigorous, handsome male tops, however off-putting their mustaches and muttonchops seem to the modern eye. Did the "lecherous fuddy-duddy" trend in male tops start with the 70s, or is it older than that?

the whipping machine

The first few clips from the Spanking Server shoot are online! I haven't seen the movies yet - rather than giving us temporary memberships to the sites, they're sending us all the content on DVD once they've finished editing, so I'll watch them when that arrives. But the preview photos look pretty good...

This was the first clip we filmed, a bare-bottom whipping from the dreaded spanking machine. Neither of us knew what to expect, or how hard it would be. We knew the canings would be severe, but how bad would the clips be? We had a whole day of them to get through before making the longer film on the second day.

Unfortunately for us, the spanking machine clips are all about the suspense. I went first, and was positioned on an uncomfortable spanking bench the wrong height for my hips. I waited there while the machine was tested, making the most awful sounds. I flinched as it whipped the air for the test shots. Not having any way of knowing what to expect, the anticipation was definitely the worst part.

Amy had it even worse, watching me take my strokes as she waited her turn, and then having to endure the whole suspense ritual all over again. She looked really good, though. The machine uses rubber singletails, which sting like anything but leave beautiful clear marks.

My next taste of the whipping machine was a breast punishment. I love breast punishment. Love it rather too much to do it professionally, a lot of the time, unless I'm working with people who don't mind turning a blind eye while I squirm. I'm not sure the Spanking Server crew were wholly comfortable with how much I enjoyed this. It was humiliating, but also really hot.

Their photographer takes stills during the filming of the clips, with a clever gadget that stops the flash being intrusive. So all the grimaces of pain are genuine, real-time reactions.

We filmed this back whipping clip early next morning, before moving onto the longer film. I hadn't slept well, I was exhausted from the day before, and I felt extremely vulnerable as I was led up to the whipping post. That gritty, fragile confusion you get from nerves and not enough sleep.

I may have writhed my way gleefully through my breast whipping the day before, but back whipping is a colder, sharper pain, and there was nothing erotic about this. I pressed my face to the rough wood and flinched my way through the strokes. The first two made me shriek so loudly that they took the machine down to a lower setting. I am a wimp. But I was glad they'd taken pity on me, because all my attention was focussed on the judicial punishments scheduled for later that day, and I just wanted the clips to be over with as soon as possible. At least my reactions were realistic - prisoners aren't meant to enjoy their punishments, after all.

I hid in the back room and sipped diet coke while Amy took the stage. I was moody and nervous, I felt bad about not braving out the back whipping, and wasn't really in the mood to watch. Which is a shame, because her outfit was adorable. And she took her whipping much better than me.

lost in translation

I spent yesterday transcribing the Pain4Fem Strict Prison film Amy and I shot in January. One of their crew speaks English, and translates their films into German for the subtitles, but he had difficulty understanding some of our phrases. Maybe they were slang. Could I help?

Watching the opening scene, I quickly realised that there was nothing wrong with their translator's colloquial English. A lot of what I was saying was pretty much unintelligible. My character was irritable and impulsive, and my lines were either muttered under my breath or came out in a big rush. The acoustics of the prison set were ringing and echoey, and I had to listen to some lines three or four times to work them out.

I was pretty upset, and disappointed. Amy is brilliant, a model of clarity and professionalism. But me? I race, trip, stumble over my lines and half of them are lost. The dialogue was improvised, as usual, so it wasn't a question of remembering a script. I must have spent three times as long working out what to say next as I did actually delivering it. I would have been better off not trying to be clever, even speaking in clichés, if it meant I could be understood.

I'm also a little bewildered. I know I speak too fast in real life, but on film? This is an amateur mistake. I've been improvising dialogue on camera for nearly three years and this hasn't been a problem - certainly not to this extent - in any of my previous films. Although, you know, feel free to tell me otherwise, I know I'm behind on watching them.

The only explanation I can come up with is nerves.

We filmed most of this in one take, and I was not in a state of centred, zen calm. I was nervous about getting through a plot I didn't feel prepared for. I felt self-conscious about my character being the centre of attention when Amy was so much more confident an actress. I'd wimped out two strokes into the back-whipping clip we'd filmed first thing that morning, and they'd had to change the whipping machine to the next spring down. That had unsettled me. And there was a much more severe back whipping still to come. And the judicial caning, which I felt totally unprepared for. I felt sick with nerves and I fluffed my lines and now EVERYTHING IS RUINED and it is ALL MY FAULT. :(

I'm hoping that either Pain4fem will agree to my suggestion to include the option of English subtitles as well as German, or that actually the problem isn't as bad as I think and I'm just being paranoid and self-deprecating. However, just in case, I want to note for the record that I've got an English transcription of the film, so, er, feel free to ask me to send you a copy if it proves necessary.

Incidentally, I still haven't seen any of juicy middle bits of the film, containing the medical scene, the back whipping and both the canings. They weren't included in the clips I was sent, presumably because they don't contain as much dialogue as the scenes before and after. I suspect it's just as well I haven't seen the punishments yet, or I'd probably be whinging about those.

the mystery implement

Tuesday's post has got me in the mood for some genuine Victoriana. I've had a couple of comments and emails from those of you who like watching a girl hold open her own split bloomers in preparation for a punishment, and I couldn't agree more. But how about the bloomers being held apart by someone else?



How hot is that? The poor girl is helpless and outnumbered, held in place by one tormentor while the other one lays into her exposed bottom. I particularly like the way the spankee's head is hanging in embarrassment and shame. I tend to hide my own face when I'm being punished, and during a shoot photographers usually prefer you to keep your head up so they can get facial reaction shots. But whenever I do see an image with a girl in that pose - shoulders bunched, head tucked away - there seems something very natural and vulnerable about it.

I don't know what this girl's done to deserve her whipping, but the outfits and body language are so good I don't really care. But - what's she being whipped with? The photographer was so busy trying to fit three dynamic poses into their composition that they have cropped the implement out of the frame. It could be anything. A hazel switch? A riding crop? A wet haddock? Who can tell?

the box of hate

D. sent me this Perry Bible Fellowship strip a while ago. Isn't it adorable? :)

parlourmaid punishments

Historical chambermaid is one of my very favourite submissive roles. I don't roleplay in private very much, but an overwhelming majority of private scenes have been based around this scenario. When I was younger and Tom and I had a more holistic D/s relationship (which was easier when I was his teenage lover, rather than the partner and equal I am now), we spent a few whole weekends in role, with me collared and subject to the formal manners he had trained me in. At the time, I described my role as "a cross between a maid, chef, valet, nurse and apprentice". But the uniform I primarily wore at home was that of a maid, and I'm wearing it again in my latest film with Northern Spanking.

This is the film I wrote about in December, discussing the hazards of improvised dialogue. At this point I'll let you in on a secret: these days, I very rarely watch my own films. When I first started working I watched them obsessively. At first, I watched them for kicks, but quickly realised that however hot the memory of shooting was, it's impossible to get off on porn starring oneself unless you're much more narcissistic than I am. I can't help casting a critical eye over my appearance, my acting, my lines, my posture, and it's too distracting to get fully immersed in the scene. Once I'd worked this out, I watched my own films with a notepad open, trying to work out what I could do better and learn from my mistakes. These days, I don't really have time.

But I wanted to watch this one, because the scenario is a favourite of mine, and because half of the film stars Niki Flynn looking ever so vulnerable, and I have no problems at all finding her films exciting. So I can wholeheartedly recommend this one. I've seen it and everything. And I even liked the bits with me in, which is surely a testament to Lucy McLean's skill as a film-maker.



Fun facts about this film:

1. My favourite line is Michael Stamp's: "I am the Master, and you are the wench!"


2. The reason my character is really bad at making beds is that, erm, I'm really bad at making beds. Seriously. I couldn't even lift that mattress, and I was so flustered and nervous that getting the wrinkles out just seemed impossible, so I didn't try. I guess Mr Stamp must have his own reasons for keeping me on ...


3. That hairbrush hurt. This was the last clip of the day, so we didn't have to worry about saving my bottom. Lucy warned me that it was evil, and she was right: it left a beautiful big bruise on my right cheek, which I fancy you can see coming up during this spanking. Anyway, don't let my stoicism fool you. (Maids are stoic, right? They're used to being beaten, and no-one likes the help to make a fuss.) It really hurt. You can tell by the way I start holding my feet protectively in front of my bum after a stroke. That's my wordless signal for "ARGH HANGONHANGONHANGON GIVE ME A SECOND OW OW OW OW OWW OW."


4. Even so, I knew he was going to do a flurry of fast swats right at the end, and I admit I was a teensy bit disappointed, when it came, that it didn't last longer. Yes, I know, I'm hopeless.


5. However! This carpet beater hurt more than other carpet beaters I have known, as well. Fewer strands, I guess, and more widely spaced making each impact slightly more cane-like. Stingy. Pretty marks, too.


6. Being beaten through bloomers is one of my favourite things in all the world. The sense of exposure and objectification, the only part of the body revealed being the part marked out for punishment. The contrast is delicious, especially if the rest of one's dress is formal and conservative. The way the fabric flatteringly frames the ass. The convenience aspect, not having to dress and undress, just bend over and go. Yum, yum, yum.

If, like me, you can't get enough of unfortunate maids in bloomers being punished by exacting (or vindictive) employers, then take a look at the photos Niki has posted of her half of the film, including a free preview clip and Lucy looking terrifying and utterly gorgeous in a turqoise ballgown. And if, like me, that still isn't enough, you'll just have to visit Northern Spanking and watch it yourself :)