scripts for C19th spanking movies

... Well, not technically movies, but plays. Plays written to be performed. On stage. (And to be sold as books, and pored over in private by voyeuristic gentlemen, of course. They didn't have blogging back then.)

This gem of a play by Algernon Charles Swinburne was published in 1888, in a volume of stories called The Whippingham Papers. I have just discovered its existence on the Spank Statement, and I couldn't wait until morning to show it to all of you. :)

It's called A Visit to Mrs. Birch and the Young Ladies of the Academy, and it is wonderful, awful, carry-on style keyword-laden spanking porn. Check out this dialogue!

Mrs. Birch - Sally reach me down the rod. Miss Drawler come out. Your neglect of your lessons must be punished with a good whipping.

Miss Drawler - A good whipping, ma’am, why I never was whipped in my life.

Mrs. Birch - That makes no difference to me; as long as you come to my school you must submit to the treatment of a scholar; and that you know is to be whipped for neglect of lessons; so come forward, Miss, and lie down upon the sofa.

Miss Drawler - No, indeed, ma’am, I shall not. I never was whipped yet; and at my age I determined I never shall be.

Mrs. Birch - Very well, miss, we shall soon see as to that. But remember, this resistance will only cost you double.

Miss Drawler - It shall cost me nothing, for I am determined I won’t submit. Leave me alone. Where are you dragging me? Let me go, Sally, let me go.

Mrs. Birch - Now, Sally, down with her across the sofa; that is right. She is now safe. Hold her hands down, I shall throw up her clothes; there they are. A little higher will be better. that will do, her bottom is quite uncovered now. There, Sally, keep her clothes up so, while I tickle her soundly.

(Miss Tickletouch gazes intently on the scene)

Miss Drawler - What are you doing? Leave my clothes alone. You shan’t take them up. Oh, dear, what shall I do? I never was whipped in my life, and I can’t bear it. Oh! oh! good gracious. Oh, don’t hurt me so. Oh, how dreadfully it stings. Oh, my bottom, my poor bottom. I can’t bear it; I can’t, indeed I can’t. Pray, pray let me go. I shall be such a good girl in the future. Oh! for heaven’s sake let me go. I can’t bear any more, indeed I can’t; it will drive me mad. Oh, dear, oh, dear. Oh, this is dreadful. Oh! oh!

Mrs. Birch - There, miss, you see who has conquered at last eh? Well you have now been whipped in spite of your earnest declarations to the contrary. And I hope it will be of lasting service to you.

This is the best spanking script I have EVER SEEN in my ENTIRE LIFE.

I want to perform this on stage. And film it. Actually no, I want to produce it as an actual hilarious spanking movie with really hot action. All I need is, er, a studio, a camera crew, cameras, lights, and models. I can probably arrange the last bit. Any volunteers to help out with the rest? :)